Just another crazy day.

It all started at 7am yesterday morning. My momma was blissfully sleeping with me at the foot of the bed, keeping watch over her.  She was totally unaware of the chaos that was about to ensue.

Chirp!  Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! My sister, Auntie Em, or Emmy as we fondly call her, and I immediately sprung into action!  My momma's in danger!  Stop!  Who goes there?!  Halt!  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!  Emmy waivered and decided to hide under the bed.  I, however, am on the job!  I jumped off the bed and raced to the front door.  No one gets past me!  You should see vat I do to bears and beavers!  Grrr.

No one was there.  I patrolled the hall.  Nothing there either.  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! "Calm down, Milo, it's just the battery in the smoke detector downstairs."  Oh.  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!  I'm not so sure. 

She went to get a new battery and returned.  She put it in.  Silence.  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! "What the..." she asked.  Don't worry, momma, I've got it covered!  She called the people at her work.  After looking for a hush button and not finding one, she took the smoke detector down.  I watched, fascinated, barking occasionally at each chirp.  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! She unhooked the alarm system.  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!  She started upstairs and I followed, bound and determined to save her from impending doom.

She tried pulling the attic door, screamed (I was there!  in a flash!) and let it slam shut.  A huge spider fell out and ran across the floor.  I like spiders, but that one was HUGE!  I don't know how he fit through that door!  Well, alright, it wasn't THAT big, but he was huge!  She killed him with a shoe, saying, "ughhgh" all the time.  He's not dead yet!!  His leg is detached and twitching!  Ack!  Kill it!  Kill it!  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!

By this time, we know there has to be another smoke detector somewhere, but daddy's still sleeping.  How can he sleep through all of this?  There is something dangerous in the house!  Is it a bear?  I can handle bears.  Is it a beaver?  I've got them covered too.  Squirrel?  I'm on it!  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!

Daddy finally gets up and comes upstairs.  After a few minutes, momma has a flashlight in hand, and finally discovers that it is only an old, dying carbon monoxide detector that keeps chirping.  Chirp! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!  Wheee!  e  e  e  e....  It squealed when she took it out of the wall and then finally.  Silence.  Chirp?  Nope.  Silence.  Blissful, beautiful silence.  Ahh..  Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!  Squirrel!